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January 28, 2008

pacified

I took my kids to the gym today. All five kids and I got dressed and left the house before 9 to go swimming. It's a workout to get the 2 little ones ready, but thankfully Kendall is around to help. The only problem is that I didn't call 24 hours in advance to arrange for babysitting for Max so he and I sat at the pool while the kids swam and worked out. I did get to swim some when Jake got tired of being away from his phone and offered to watch Max (ie: text msg while the baby slept). After an hour we got Tess from the kid zone and let her go swimming. She was awesome in the pool. It was an hour later, when we decided to LEAVE that she got her ass on her shoulders and threw the fit that will send people scrambling to get away from us the next time we walk into the place. She was screaming at the top of her lungs that she was NOT LEAVING THE POOL and ripping her clothes off as fast as I could dress her. Meanwhile I'm trying to not beat the daylights out of her since we're in public and Kendall is saying "just spank her". As I was leaving, one of my new-found buddies (who talked to me because she noticed I was reading The Dirt) asked if I need a hand. I told her I needed a valium and she laughed. I hope I see her again, she gets it. In the future Tess will be staying in the kid zone and I'll be going to the gym when the kids are in school or at 3am...I don't care, but it won't be when Tess is anywhere in sight. Oh I also met another lady because Jake used her towel on accident. She was nice but uh, her kids go to Fredericksburg Christian School, so I've got a feeling I'd offend her eventually.

The Dirt has become an obsession with me. I love this book. Thanks Terri for loaning it to me. I even have rock star dreams now. It's awesome.

Oh PS. it's 2:50 on a Monday and I just cracked open a beer. I might be all out of shape and tired and crabby but I'm not working for one more entire week. Take that suckers.

Ok so...here's a funny story. This one gets a little confusing so try to keep up. I talked to Traci today on the phone. She's my highschool BFF. She married my ex-nephew and I won her in the divorce settlement, as well as most of his family.
She said that Robin, (ex-husband's current wife...mullet wearing hockey player) went to get her hair cut at the same haircuttery where my ex-neice, jessica (she's mine from the divorce as well) works. She had an appointment with Candice, who is a friend of Jessica's.
WELL...Candice is pregnant so after Robin threw a huge fit about being taken back for her 10am appointment 15 minutes late, she was telling Candice all about how her husband's ex-wife (ME!!!)had 3 kids from the first marriage and then had 2 more accidental kids by the 2nd husband and that the last thing they need is more kids at her age. BLAHBLAHBLAH. Of course Candice told Jessica who told Traci who told me. It's a small town with big ears and mouths.

Now, this is the 2nd time I've busted her stupid mullet-wearing-chainsmoking self talking smack about me. The first time I told the ex to check his wife before I have to deal with her myself and he promised it'd be taken care of. Now I have to figure out the perfect way to approach this. I don't want to get too close to her when I tell her off because uh, she could prolly kick my ass.

Posted by krystal at 3:14 PM | Comments (4)

January 26, 2008

layers

I got a haircut this week and now I feel like I took a fast train back to '85. It's my fault. I went to my dr's appointment Tuesday just to be told that they told one of my kids that the appointment was cancelled. (jake...who else). So I drove on over to the haircuttery and told the girl "I've been trying to curl my hair and it falls out, will you just give me some layers and keep the length". This girl was so nice. We hit it off right away and she chopped chopped chopped while we chatted and since I can't wear glasses when I get my haircut I had no idea that she was giving me the haircut perfect for slut wings...crooked ones. I'm not sure what the hell is up with this haircut. After 4 days of fiddling with it, and anyone who knows me knows that I don't give much time to my hair, it still does NOTHING but look like a busted bail of hay. Maybe I'll just pretend I mean to have hair that looks like this. Maybe I'll get paid later this week and go somewhere else and see if it's fixable. Most likely I'll just do the same thing I do with all other haircuts and ignore it til 6 months goes by and it's time for another haircut.

We have an entire weekend with nothing to do and no money to do it with. I know there will come a day when that's great news but right now it's just more of the same thing I've been doing all week. My brain aches for stimulation and my body aches for something that isn't fat free. I'm a big fat whiney baby and I want to go out somewhere other than to the grocery store or to pick up Jake's lame ungrateful ass from work.

Let me see, there's got to be something good to type about. Here goes... a list.

1. I saw Kendall practicing for Annie. She's playing Tessie, one of the orphans. It looks fabulous and I can't wait to see the real play.

2. Max slept almost 5 hours one night this week before waking up to eat. If I can get him to do this nightly I'll be less of a bitchy zombie. Eeeh, at least I'll be less of a zombie.

3. Tess just brought me the nail clippers and asked me to clip her nails. She's on the ball even when I let things go.

4. Trevor has been an angel. Twice this week he watched max and tessie so I could go pick up Kendall from play practice.

Posted by krystal at 1:37 PM | Comments (3)

January 21, 2008

I had a dream

Last night i got to sleep long enough to have many dreams! Mom watched Tess and baby Max for the whole night so I slept for 8 hours STRAIGHT. Not even a bathroom break. It was heavenly and a good reminder that sleep time is not to be taken for granted.

We had a wonderful weekend. Saturday was pampered chef/rock band. There were lots of people here and as far as I know everyone had a good time. I got to see Jessica before-hand on her way to Manda's shower too. She gave Max 3 adorable outfits which were desparately needed because while he has tons of 3-6 month clothes, he's still short and squatty and can only wear newborn stuff. He's growing though. Thanks Jessica! If anyone still wants to place an order for pampered chef stuff, just go to amy's site by Friday. That's when we're closing up shop for this party.

Yesterday I was a bit hungover and spent a lot of time just being lazy and watching Big Love with Dan. We're down to 3 episodes and then we'll have to find a new addiction. Last night we dropped off the babies and then went up north to Sarah and Josh's house for supper club. It was the perfect size crowd and we ate sooooooo much good food. After dieting hard core for 2 solid weeks it was good to splurge a bit. I'm down 4.8 lbs now from the starting point 2 weeks ago. I'm so impatient with weight loss. I want to lose it all at once even though I didn't gain it that way. I'm sure exercising will give me a bit of a push.

Tess just told me that it's time to go potty so I'm out!

Posted by krystal at 3:09 PM | Comments (0)

January 17, 2008

I confess

I have started watching soap operas again. I watch Y&R and ATWT and sometimes I watch GL. I even added some to my tivo. Haus frau = me. Instead of bonbons I eat sugar free jello. I'm back on weight watchers and going strong. I lost 2.6 lbs the first week and now I have a mere 50some lbs to go. ha. I'll get there, don't you worry. I haven't started back at the gym yet. My 6 week checkup is on the 22nd so uh, my time is counting down. I have 2 weeks left of maternity leave and I'm hoping that by then I can fit into my old clothes. If not I'll be living in the same pair of black pants that fit me no matter how fat I am.

Saturday is my pampered chef party. Just when I thought I'd gotten everything I could possibly want from them, I've added a lot to my wish list and I would have added more but I'm trying to get back on a financial diet as well. I hope I sell enough stuff that I don't have to pay for most of what I get. (ps thanks for your order grammy!!). As usual this party will not be typical. Aaron's bringing Rock Band so that he and Dan can play down in the basement with the kids. I'm making some turkey chili and some jerk chicken nachos for snacks. I'm trying to keep things low in points for this party but I'm sure I'll have a few naughty things there for those skinny people who are not on a starvation diet.
Sunday is supper club up at Sarah's house. I'm stoked about that night because not only do we get to hang out with friends and eat great food, but we also get to leave Tessie and Max at mom's house overnight. It'll be our first night without him. I've not wanted to leave him with mom because he's still not a great sleeper but she says she can handle it. I know she can. This baby is not for the weak of heart though. He demands attention pretty much anytime he's awake. I spend the majority of my days holding him. I don't mind. I love holding him and have found that I can do laundry, prepare meals and change the sheets on the bed all with Max tucked in one arm. He allows that, but he does not allow me to put him down. I won't call him a brat yet, but I can't promise I won't use that word in the near future.

Speaking of brats...Jake got suspended for 3 days for cursing a kid and threatening to kick his ass. I'm not sure of the details because I'm firmly planted in the "Jake's on his own" camp. I drug tested him (he's clean) and then I stuck him in the PASS program in Stafford and he got to spend his suspension days there doing school work, group therapy and community service. He hates it. I win.

We still don't have our car back from the shop...I hope we'll get it next week.

Posted by krystal at 1:10 PM | Comments (3)

January 6, 2008

Goods

Nothing bad has happened in the past 4 days.

We got a very funny card from Dan's folks that sort of gave me a paradigm shift in regards to Jake. Maybe just a paradigm shake...I'm still standing firm on my resolve.

Had Terri and Kayla over on Thursday for our would-be-survivor night and then on Saturday the mean mommies got back together like old times. We watched movies and drank beer and Becks kicked our ass at Scene-it. It makes me think I might need an xbox 360...or at least to watch more movies so I can do better next time. In the midst of this we had Trevor and 11 of his closest friends playing loud music and making noise in the basement, The house was a mess and full and happy.

Eating right has been going ok...I'm going to do an official weigh-in tomorrow so I can start "officially" with the girls. I'll also start counting my points rather than just skipping a bunch of meals and eating what I want for dinner. I know how to do this right and I will.

Today I'm going to make my menu for the rest of the week's meals and drink some pomegranite martinis. Sunday does not have to suck. (even if there's not an episode of Law and Order in sight).

And in the forcast...Ed Beamurhead is coming to visit for the weekend and I'm so happy about that. I remember the first time he came and he was just a wee baby owl and now he's a dad and grown up. I told him he has to sleep on the couch and that the baby will wake him up and he reminded me that it's not the first time he'd been woken up by one of my kids. The first time he visited, Kendall was an infant. Time sure does fly.

Posted by krystal at 2:41 PM | Comments (1)

January 3, 2008

Pampered

Ok so I started a book club thread on Fredtalk a few months ago hoping that it'd inspire me and others to get back into reading for a book club.

That didn't happen. People said they would but I guess it's not a good time of year for starting to read.
I've also decided to combine that day into a pampered chef party so that I can clean my house once for a wizbanger of a fun day. That's right, I said wizbanger.

So, if you're reading this and you're not some axe murderer, you're invited to my house on 1/19 at 3pm for a pampered chef party. If you want to read and discuss Special Topics in Calamity Physics by Marisha Pessl, please feel free to join us at 2pm on 1/19 for book club. As it stands, there are only 2 of us reading the book, maybe 3. If you just want to come around and see how people discuss a book even when they haven't read it...show up whenever you want, we'll be here doing just that! If you'd like to place an order from Amy's web site instead of spending your day eating and drinking and being merry with us...that'd be rockin' too. Just go to
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/chefamyskitchen and put in my name when you place your order, please.

In other news, Dan, Jake, Trevor, Kendall and Tess are all gone today and Max and I have had a superb time sleeping and watching TV. My brain is finally starting to settle down and we're mastering the art of being slugs. Slugs who do not overeat. I had a slimfast for breakfast and chicken soup for lunch. booyah.

Posted by krystal at 1:13 PM | Comments (5)

January 2, 2008

Resolve - v.2008

I've been moping around all morning because today my real diet started. I've dropped 20 lbs since the baby was born but I have about 60 more to lose and I want to do it for real now that I don't have pregnancy to blame. On the bright side, since I got pregnant my blood pressure has been back to normal and I haven't gone on any happy pills yet, even though several times since the holidays I've wished I was on them.

Our Christmas break was pretty much a bag of shit, thanks to Jake. He started with wrecking our car, moved on to fucking up Christmas and then made New Years Day feel like a week. We're trying something new though. Jake wants to be treated like an adult. Dan and I have grown weary of his constant lies and bad attitude so from this point on...he's as close to adult as we can live with. He can come and go as he pleases...until 10pm. He can find his own rides to places or pay us for his gas usage and we'll drive him places if we want to. If he wants to use a phone, he can use the cell phone he pays for. If he wants to use a computer and the internet, he can purchase a computer and pay for his own internet connection. This way, he has nothing to lie to us about. If this doesn't work we're at a loss because nobody else wants him. I'm required to supply him with food and shelter, but luxuries are not required and will not be supplied. I am determined that this will not be another year wrecked by Jake. I've got 4 other kids who don't screw up and lie and treat us like crap...those are the kids who will get our time and attention. Jake is on his own...just like he wants.

I have several things aside from dieting and disowning my kids that I want to work on this year. I plan on cooking, saving money, planning a nice vacation for Dan and I without kids even if it means we're going to have to save for a few years first so we can go. The gym membership we pay for will see use this year. The kids want to go and I need to. We're going to get there. I also plan on being more social again. Last year got off to a good start then pregnancy sort of killed my desire to be social. I'm slowly feeling the need to be around friends...we will just have to find a babysitter for evenings. I trust the kids to watch Tess but Max is too little yet and I don't feel ok leaving him with anyone.

Oh, by the way...Max is delicious. He's a good baby. He sleeps 4 hours between feedings at night most of the time. He's a lot more vocal than Tessie was. (read: the kid can scream LOUD!!!). I find myself constantly smelling is baby head and playing with his toes.

And now he's awake. peas. Happy 2008.

Posted by krystal at 1:13 PM | Comments (4)